Permission to Cross The Patio Dadio

Back when I was in boot camp they warned us to never.... Never... say, "Permission to cross the patio dadio" when requesting permission to cross the quarterdeck.  It was one of those things that would earn a person the maximum punishment available during peacetime.  But it always seemed to happen.  I remember hearing a story everywhere I went (RTC GLakes, NTC GLakes, NPS, Big E, etc.) about some drunken fool muttering those damning words as he stumbled up to the OOD and gave his half-assed salute to the flag.  I was always afraid that I would say it under the influence of drunken stupidity.

Speaking of drunken idiots trying to cross the quarterdeck, hey Lance, do you remember that time in HK when we bought that Mao Tse Tung hat (a big green floppy thing with a big red star on it) and put it on the head of some drunken fool waiting in line in front of us to cross the quarterdeck?  I remember the chief checking IDs yelling at him about being a commie.  The drunken fool had no idea what was going on.

The Mad Shitter?

Hi Guys its me Tim. I was in RE div from 86-90. Boy your site sure brings back the memories. Hey KP remember the time we got drunk in the PI, whoa man that was sure something! That tattoo place was having a two-for-one special.  I remember that you shaved your head and got "FTN" and "Eat Shit" done on your skull above the hairline.  Man you were crazy back then. Remember the Mad Shitter?  The guy who was taking dumps all over the ship and in public places? They never figured it out man but it was me. Anyway thanks for the stories I'll check in now and then.  Oh Yeah don't forget to include my email address in your list....

Later,
Tim Dougherty 

Another 2-plant RM From the 80s:

I stumbled upon your site today. I don't have any sea stories for you but feel free to put my info on your alum page.

Mark Maier
RM-22
1988-1992
mmaier@bnflinc.com 

More From Scott French

Severe Drunkenness

Speaking of drunks trying to get back on the ship, do you guys remember in Italy when people had to be put into stretchers and hoisted up the fantail because they were too drunk to climb the ladder back onto the ship?  They then brought those idiots (still strapped to their stretchers) to medical and hung them upright so that nobody could choke on their own vomit.  I'm glad I never got that drunk.

An A-Ganger!

My name is Todd "Howie" Howard. I served on the Enterprise from 2/91-12/92 in A-Division, Steam heat shop.

Another 60s Era Aft Group RM

I served aboard the Enterprise from 1966 to 1971, RM Division in 2 and 3 plant, and RT division during the refueling and overhaul of 1970-'71.

Milk!

Whenever we pulled back into Alameda after a long cruise the first thing I did was find a place to get some milk.  I didn't crave beer, pizza, cheeseburgers or anything else, .... just milk.  It must have had something to do with the fact that we never got real milk, only that soy-crap that was in a box.  Sometimes the chocolate stuff tasted okay if it was chilled but nothing beat the real thing.

Ring Bus O Rama

HME Remembers The Mad Shitter

The missuz knows me too well--During my regular weekend ritual, I was busting my gut out reading the Official Rx site, and she asked me, "Are you on that Ramsey O' Toole site again? I KNOW that laugh!" Well, I'm busted: browsing the funniest website on the planet.

I remember two Phantom Shitters on the ship. The real Phantom would leave deposits in various office trash cans about the ship. And then there was a Phantom imposter who merely dropped loaves in the Rx aft head showers. So is Timmy the Imposter the shower shitter? Unlike shitting in trash cans, which is pretty cool, shitting in the shower is just dumb--my $0.02

I also recall the in port firebug. Predictably, the NIS arrested 
an innocent patsy and the trashcan fires kept on happening despite the perp supposedly being in the Norfolk brig (naturally, it was rumored he was homosexual as well). 

Remember when the NIS came up to the RT void to teach us all about the evil commie honeykos? Ov gorse you do! Mike the Wad was mesmerized--go revisit the Adventures of Blister Dick at http://re04.tripod.com  I think BD escaped that peril, only to go down to TJ to see a Donkey Show--where, unfortunately, he became the star of the Donkey Show!

C'ya,
HME 

A Steering Gear Near Calamity

Politics 1988

More About the Phantom Shitter

Hey KP,

I was going to write about the Phantom Shitter, but I see a couple of people beat me to it. I remember during the "shitter's" reign of terror that the berthing chief actually removed the doors to the shower rooms, removed the shower curtains, and posted "Shit Watch" -- a roving watch that tried to catch the phantom "in the act." It never worked. Since I couldn't shower with my glasses on, and since the showers were usually filthy, I'd have to get on my hands and knees to determine whether the "brown mass" was shit or just a clump of hair... What fun.

The RC Shop Stereo

My Two Cent's Worth

Since We're on The Subject of Bodily Functions.....

Do you guys remember those RC pit monsters that were so lazy that they wouldn't even leave their pit when they had to use the head.  They would just piss into a bottle and save it until they were finally driven from their pit by bed soars (or their next watch).  One guy logged an amazing 28 hrs straight of pit time.  My personal record was 18 hrs.  

Another E-Div Pal!

Hey man, Remember Kyle Dixon? Still alive and doin' fine. Put me on the list. EE30 86-89

kdixon34@hotmail.com

The ATM Bandits

Do you guys remember when The Big E put in all those ATMs?  We were actually the first ship in the navy to do so.   (This happened about 1988 or so.)  It was a big deal and the navy bragged about how much money it would save by not having to print checks anymore. Each sailor was given an account and his check was deposited automatically on payday.  One day shortly after the ATMs were installed a dispersing clerk filling an ATM accidentally put $20 bills in the $5 slot. Within hours word had spread and soon the line to use that particular machine was a mile long. Unethical Big E squids were withdrawing huge sums of money and asking for it all in $5 bills. Later that day the dispersing officer noticed the long line for that ATM and was puzzled since the other ATMs sat idle. He did some investigating and quickly figured out what was happening. The next day in the POD it was suggested that anyone "receiving extra money" from the improperly filled ATM should return it to dispersing immediately. Most people complied with the suggestion since it was made clear that dispersing had detailed electronic records of everyone using the machine that day (and how much money they took out). Those that didn’t return their ill-gotten booty were hunted down and punished.  

Another RC11 Alum

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas Big E Alumni!

Just a quick note to wish everyone and their family a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  

More About the Aft Head

I was just reading the story by Dave Lambermont about how nasty the aft head was. I remember one time I had to get up for a normal work day underway (a special hell for an RE!). I was in a line in the aft head waiting for a shower to open. There were probably 10 of us standing by the urinals dressed in matching white (gray) towels with our shower shoes on and clutching our matching mesh bags full of toiletries. One shower opened and Dave was the next in line. He stepped up to the stall, hung up his bag, and went to hang his towel on the hook. Then the unthinkable happened; his towel fell off the hook and landed square on that disgusting floor. Everything stopped. It was like watching a car wreck, horrible to see but we had to know what would happen next. Dave thought for a minute or so and finally just took his bag off the hook and left, never so much as looking back. When I got out of my shower Dave was standing at the back of the line wearing a new towel as if nothing had happened.

Looking back, I am amazed we lived in such squalor that if 
something you owned touched the floor you would rather abandon it than have it washed. 

Of course that same head got Guido out of the Navy.

Dicko

Shipyard Hell

More About MMCM

You know, maybe MMCM Deaville was right. I mean, seriously, think about it. When we were all 20-something we really didn’t seem to notice or care about how filthy and disgusting Rx berthing really was. I had forgotten all about how smelly and disgusting that place was. Did people really shit and piss in the showers? I guess they did. I’ll never forget wading through 2 inches of water and muck and seeing the occasional "brown trout" floating around on the deck while waiting in line to take a shower. I mentioned earlier that when I returned to the Big E for a dependent’s day cruise 5 years after becoming a civilian that I was horrified by the condition of rx berthing. When MMCM arrived in ’86 he obviously saw the same thing and decided to do something about it. 

His biggest beef with us was always the condition of berthing—it was a pigsty! I can’t remember why I hated MMCM so much (time has erased the specifics) but it was mainly because he made life hell for us, especially when it came to our health and comfort in berthing. 

My first introduction to MMCM came when he walked up to me in berthing and gave me one of those dreaded "green stickers" on my ID card for wearing white socks. That stupid green sticker made it so that I couldn’t leave the ship in civilian clothes for a month. 

"Lurch" McClure was also gung-ho about berthing and I guess we all know why now. I remember his famous line was: "This is a warship—not a college dormitory!" He said this when cracking down on all the crap that was being stowed in the overheads and above the racks (bikes, TV sets, VCRs, guitars, etc.).

One of the first things MMCM did when he began his reign of terror was create the RX coop. It soon became the bane of all saps unlucky enough to get sent there. But face it guys—at least then someone was attempting to swab the deck, sort laundry and clean the showers and toilets. 

I remember when MMCM was finally gone there was great joy in RX dept.  But I'm sure every man sleeping in berthing at that time would agree that it was a wee bit cleaner and better organized. 

MMCM came back often to visit after he retired and I was always baffled by his willingness to revisit the men who hated him so much. Maybe he actually cared about us guys.

The Mysterious Goo Foot

"Guido" arrived on the E the same day as the rest of us 8502 nukes did. Guido went to RM22 after BNEQ quals and remained there until the end of the ’86 Westpac. One day during the cruise Guido’s leg really swelled up. He was in terrible pain and crawled to sick bay for medical attention. Since it was after the hours of sick call the corpsman manning the watch desk told him to come back in the morning. Guido just lay on the floor and told the guy that he couldn’t move and would stay there until a doctor came to see him. The corpsman, noting that Guido was really just going to lie there, reluctantly called a doctor. 

When the doctor arrived and saw how swollen Guido’s leg was he took a ballpoint pen from his pocket and drew an outline around the swelling so that he could track whether it was expanding or receding. Guido was then put in a bed and wheeled into the ship’s hospital. A few minutes later a second doctor arrived to have a look. He then told Guido that he suspected that the swelling was the result of Guido’s tattoo (he was pointing to the ink line that the previous doctor had drawn). Guido knew then that he was dealing with an idiot and was going to be in trouble.

Guido’s leg returned to normal in a few days and was sent back to work. Then a few weeks later his leg swelled up again and he was readmitted. The doctors had no idea what the problem was and so he was in and out of the ship’s hospital for the rest of the Westpac.

Finally when we returned to Alameda the doctors on the ship decided to send Guido to Oak Knoll to see if they could figure it out; they couldn’t and Guido was deemed unfit for sea duty and transferred to NAS Alameda. Guido was actually offered an early out and foolishly accepted it. He should have begged and pleaded to remain in the navy and then they would have cast him out immediately; by agreeing to be discharged it pretty much guaranteed that he would be screwed with and have to remain in the navy for at least another year.

At NAS Alameda Guido was sent to work in the base security office and from there assigned to the base traffic court. He was a lowly 3^rd class, working for a senior chief, who in turn worked for some Lt. (who was the "judge"). The Lt. soon transferred out and the senior chief retired and Guido was left there all alone. He was unofficially given the rank of traffic judge and told to run the office until a replacement for the former judge showed up—which never happened.

Those were great times for those of us that were friends of Guido, for we became above the law. We parked everywhere and anywhere we wanted and collected our multitude of base parking and speeding tickets by the bag full and then brought them to Judge Guido, who promptly dismissed them.

Guido was also merciless when it came to revoking the base driving privileges of anyone that he knew and hated from his former life on the E. I forget exactly who it was but one day a CPO in 2 plant was unlucky enough to get a speeding ticket on the base and lost his base sticker altogether. The "judge" really let him have it!

In those days MMCM Deville was also on a personal crusade to rid the CPO parking lot of non CPO-type cars. He did this by scraping off those yellow date stickers from the windshields of offending automobiles. We didn’t care—we could always get more from our pal Guido! This confounded MMCM and that made it all the more desirable for us to park in the CPO lot whenever we could, even though there were much better spots to be found in the officer’s lot.

Our lawlessness was short lived, though, since the base security force wasn’t exactly staffed with idiots and they began to notice that the same cars and people were forever being ticketed to no effect. Guido was exposed and soon replaced much to our dismay. Guido didn’t care because he was finally getting his long awaited discharge from the navy. 

The Old vs. The New

The Jackhammer Arrives!

Big E Sound Effects

I laughed when I saw the picture [above] of an LP of Enterprise Sound Effects.  I wonder if they included the sound of rx berthing in the middle of the night when the screws were cavitating, the engine shop was testing engines and all the lounge TV sets were blaring at full volume.  The noise was so overwhelming; yet, somehow, we were all still able to hear whenever someone unplugged and then tried to "steal" one of those giant hurricane fans.  On an average IO night there were about a dozen of those things distributed throughout berthing providing marginal cooling.  It was like gang warfare trying to establish control over them. 

More Berthing Nightmares.....

A Living Hell....Or Not?

SMOKING JOE ARRIVES!!!!! 

Bill, 

I just found your website. It's great. I am not sure if you remember me or not, but I was on the ship from 1986-1991 (about 2 years in RE03 and the rest in RE01). 

Joe Miskell 
josephfmiskell@juno.com

More From Smoking Joe ...

Smoking Joe sent me the following info about his whereabouts these days:

Another Worthy EE30 Electrician Arrives On the Scene

Hi,

I'm Dave Halliwell, and I served on the Big E from 1986 to 1992, and was in EE30. My e-mail is goakeep@aol.com.

Thanks for putting up this site, it has brought back a lot of fond memories from my time on Enterprise.

Thanks,
Dave 

The Classic Literature Caper!

Thinking about Dave Halliwell getting busted with a book down the plant reminded me of a funny story that I haven't thought about in years.  If you don't mind I think I'll share it with you:

It was no secret that electricians were the worst offenders of the "no unauthorized reading material in the plants" rule. This was primarily because we were barricaded in the SWGR room and could easily hide whatever it was that we were reading when a khaki came into the space. Some watch supervisors did everything they could to catch us in the act and would sneak into SWGR as quietly as possible. Chief Ugaki was the best at this and could literally get right beside you before you even knew he was there.  (Ugaki was cool though and never busted anyone--he just loved to catch people.)

Sometime during the ’88 cruise I got into the bad habit of reading on watch. At that time I was reading mostly classic literature because "Mike the Wad" was taking a classic literature correspondence course and was giving me all his books when he was done with them. One day I was on watch and was engrossed in the novel Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin. Before I knew it MMC Triggs came storming into the SWGR on a personal crusade to find unauthorized reading material. I had only a few seconds to act and tossed my book on top of one of the switchgears. That would have been sufficient had anyone other than MMC Triggs been the one searching for UA reading material. The first thing Triggs did was climb up on top of the switchgear and find the book. He accused the SWGR operator of reading it but that guy rightly denied it. Triggs then turned his accusations toward me and I denied it as well. Triggs made note of who we were and then left SWGR to show the Watch Officer what he found. The WO was E-Div’s Mr. Anderson and he really didn’t give a shit. He was, however, amused that the unauthorized reading material was at least culturally enriching rather than the usual Star Trek or Sci-Fi crap that was usually found down the plant.

A few days later "Mike the Wad" had a similar run in with Triggs while he was reading Return of the Native by Thomas Hardy on watch.  MMC Triggs found the book and, again, accusations were made and denied.  Rather than wasting his find on an apathetic WO, Triggs went straight to CHUD. 

Then a day or two later MMC Triggs found Human Bondage by Somerset Maugham in SWGR.  I can't remember who hid that book but it was the last straw.  CHUD was furious and decided to find the "well-read" culprit and punish him severely. I found this amusing and, thus, began to hide classic literature throughout the plants. I basically went to the ship’s "trade one for another" paperback library and "lifted" as many classic novels as I could find.  Every day I hid one or two in the plants so eager watch supes could gather them up like Easter Eggs and bring them to CHUD, who was focusing his investigation on college-educated enlisted men.

Sometimes when I was in a particularly devious mood I would sneak into the Rx office late at night and hide books in CHUD’s "In Basket" between piles of neglected paperwork. My sources in the Rx Admin office assured me that CHUD "blew up" whenever he found one of them. 

I forget how the whole thing finally played out. I think we pretty much ran out of classic literature on the ship and so the thing pretty much petered out. 

Big E 60's Style

Where are all the old nukes????? I have been digging through the box of old pix in the attic.....many of the flight deck ops (no cameras in the enginerooms, remember), sunrise/sunset (who knows which any more?) and a few of shipmates and port of calls. They all are from the WestPac cruises of ' 67 & ' 68. How many can I send to you Mooj? I currently have about 60 of them in .jpg format (lord knows, they didn't start life that way). And I do have a few sea stories to pass on, but not now. Can any one name (it is not me) the Nuke in the film badge ? I still have this......with film in it!!!!....collecting REM's for 33 years. I also have other significant memorabilia, I just don't know the right way to present it once I have dusted it off.....some of the old 4 planters might know of which I speak....& everybody thought Vickroy had it! How about it Dave (the original dilligaf/figmo) English? Do you remember painting the walls in #4 EOS? The party picture is a division party on Grande Island. Any feedback is appreciated. 

Lyn Small ....RT 4 plant 

Chief Ugaki

Another 60's-70's RM!

'67 & '68 WESTPAC Photos

Lyn Small has collected his cruise photos and put them on his own website.  The URL is http://home.earthlink.net/~lsmall/  

Another 90s Nuke

Hey there. I was surprised when I found this site. I was going through the sea stories sections and came across one that sounded very familiar. I came onboard the Big E in '93 and had to go to the building in NN for indoc. The only thing I remember about that was when the police officer came by and showed pictures of guys who had committed suicide. After that, we had to go to the FAF (a barge across from the pig with classrooms and such) for some sort of qualification. For the first month all we did was sit around and play pitch or hearts. Then they must have got serious about quals and started getting on people's butts to get qualified. The most lasting memory about all this was one day we were in class and I was drawing different things in my notebook while the instructor was babbling about something and the CO came in. This was all well and good except that the XO was standing next to me during all this. When they called attention on deck for the CO to leave I set my notebook down on my chair and stood up. I must have brainfarted because right there on my notebook in big letters was "FTN." When the CO left the XO looked at me and said he wanted to see me in the other room. I was bewildered as to why he wanted to talk to me until I looked down at my chair. Chills ran down my back as I followed him into the next room. He asked what "FTN" meant, and me, being quick on my feet (yeah right) said it meant "Fine Time in the Navy." He asked me if I was having a fine time in the navy and I answered, "Oh yes sir, a very fine time." I didn't do much drawing on my note book after that. That's my first story. I have a couple more but I'll wait to send them. I am glad to see all these other stories from so many other sailors. As for where I worked, I worked in 4MMR as an MM2.  It was a mess when I got there. There wasn't anything in the plant the first time I went down there. We had to wear these blue hard hats and eye protection. I wasn't sure exactly what an engine room was supposed to look like for almost a year after I got there. I'm looking forward to reading more stories so keep em coming.

More Big E Photos from Glenn Faus!

Be aware that this site goes down at 10PM PST/PDT to conserve energy.

Photos
 

Another Modern Era Nuke

Just a note, I was in em23 for 4 years in 94-00. I will look thru my records for any names and current links I can think of. unfortunately, most of my email addresses are expired. 

Another 80-90s RM

Some e-mail address changes

Ram,

I had to change my email address to zerance@attbi.com. Also, I was in RC-14 not RC-22. Years were 1985-1989. Thanks again for the site.

Randy Zerance

Hi, 

My home email address has been changed from cburian@mediaone.net to cburian@attbi.com

Regards,
Chris Burian  

A Really Old Timer!

I was on her from 62-65 in the 1st division. My email is emacn65@aol.com.  Still looking for guys in that
time frame.  Thanks for this site. 

Two RE04 Old Salts!

I had a great visit from an old pal last weekend.  Those of you who served in RE during the '88 and '90 cruises should know who these two old timers are.

Another Early '60s Big E Nuke

Hi,

Another Big Alumni!

Hello. Your website is great. I'd like to add my name to your alumni list. My name is Eric Daw. I served in RM23 for 1989-1992 and RM00 from 1992-1993. 

My e-mail is edawak7@att.net. 

More From Steamer

Another Early 70's RM:

Maurice Smith, RM Division and RM Plant 2, 1971-1976 

An Old EE30 Friend!

Not sure if you would remember me—I was an EE-30 guy, who hung out with Lenny Meyer and those guys. I got on the Big E as you were steaming across the Red Sea in 86, just in time for the line of death and Italy port o’ call. I remember going to a party out at your place in Livermore or Dublin or something like that a long time ago. I've been reading the web site and laughing my ass off. I just saw the entry that you are moving to phoenix. I have been here for the last 3 years and have taken a job that will keep me here for a while longer. Let me know when you are in town and we should hook up for a beer or something.

Later,
Craig Norquist

craignorquist2@cox.net

Another 2-Plant Mechanic

I was nuc mm2 on the big E from 1993-1994, during the shipyard years. I'm Ken Mazur, and was in 2 MMR, I'm thinking EM22.

Please add me to the list!

Another 3-Plant Mechanic

I was on the pig in RM23 from 1981-1986

Jim Whitsett Has Arrived!!

When I started this website about a year ago I did so to find old shipmates, many of whom I had not seen or heard from in over fifteen years. One person I hoped to find was my old chief, Jim Whitsett. He was one of my favorite people on the Big E and has been mentioned countless times on this web site. Needless to say I was thrilled when I got the following E-mail message from him last week:

Hi, Ram. Your artwork is as great today as it was 15 years ago. Please add me to your roster.

What I remember being the funniest about the Blister Dick saga (see RE04 dopey books link) was that it all started with Snook telling everybody what a big secret their experience had been and not to tell a soul. As the Chief, I kept my mouth shut, then one night while I was sneak reading the dopey book the whole saga unfolded and it turned out they'd told everybody the big secret.

Jim Whitsett
RE 1978-1980 and RE 1985-87

More From Jim W.....

Hi, Ram. Don't know if you want to use this, but I got such a kick out reading through the site that I made notes, then put it all together covering two tours and some things that aren't covered on there.

FIRST TOUR (AUG 78 – OCT 80), nub and RE

- "Mo Sux" in honor of an old CRA named Mo Flaherty (before my time) and purportedly welded on the bottom of the ship (as also supposedly is "Bush Sux" – not the President); BM2 Ben J. Degusgos; Guy Karafa and the RE Mean Machine, our softball team during the yard period in Bremerton; EM1 then EMC Mike Burkhardt; EMC Kelley; Jeff Danner; Tom Lindmark; Terry King; Bruce Prehal; during the yards the holes were cut between plants, and the in plant MC didn’t go throughout the plants so some would run from plant to plant below decks avoiding getting paged; "diesel tours" that could take hours; being offered contraband in 1MMR by the gnarly CMO our very first day we had TLDs and were making our naïve, excited first tour into the "real plants", in 1978; snowball fights on the CTG flats in the yards; RMs and their expansion tank readings even though they were isolated; somebody getting busted for cutting the NI’s toward the end of the yard period; bunks made up in the wireways and on top of the switchboards, and on lube oil tanks out on the flats; having to work up courage to ask gnarly BM’s to open their spaces so we could check the RC ventilation solenoids; Mr. Block, still the most squared away officer I ever knew, along with Mr. Sevald, and Captain Kelley (later CINCPACFLT) stopping to talk to us 4 plant RE’s and making us feel important as he went to the meeting once per week in 4 SWGR.

- Baseball in 8SWGR using wadded up HP tape and the nozzle from the nearest fire extinguisher.

- As a recruiter, the BMC I worked for tried to bust me for lack of military bearing, but I finally convinced him that we are from two different worlds and I was just a "typical nuke, not a bad guy", and job took precedence over trying out for being in the next issue of the Blue Jackets Manual. Our Chief Recruiter up in Portland hated my guts solely because I was a nuke.

SECOND TOUR (DEC 84 – JAN 88)

- Lots of  First Classes in RT, most all of which were STAR babies sent there from tenders to meet manning requirement, but they were all getting out in a few months with no intention of qualifying.

- EM2 John referred to earlier as always getting good deals (for covering our asses on the Training books and being such a good front image for us, flying the RE flag so to speak).  One very sharp guy.

- When Gil went to mast for hiding his bike in the overhead of berthing as a direct result of the Skeletor and Devil. Sorry, Gil. That was about the same time, just underway for the 86 PAC, that all of Rx berthing was pasted with FTN posters in protest of the berthing cleanup.

- Nobody has mentioned ETCS Cook. I served with him again after he'd become a CWO3 a few years later.  He ran VINSON RC shop, was well liked by them.

- Conklin and the time he bagged ass for liberty early during the 3M inspection and got called for a spot check. Fullmer put on a shirt that said "Conklin" and aced the inspection, and Conklin got the glowing write up. I had Conklin on the brow the next few days in his whites for that, getting razzed by all. A good guy. A good, big, guy. Flaming red hair and too many muscles for me to mess with.

- Yes, Dwayne B**h. I guess he got let go for medical purposes during the 88 PAC. Last I saw him, early 90’s, he was selling NCOA insurance on Whidbey Island , WA .  In the mid to late nineties the NCOA lost all it’s access and could no longer come onto bases with preferential treatment for some untoward reason or another. It was none too soon, as far as I was concerned, and eliminated those retired Chiefs from intimidating young kids to buy.

- ET Dave W*****n is on classmates.com under Enterprise in the military section. Make your own determination if the site is a joke or for real. Gag.

- EMC Lee W*****r being made to stand RE watch by Gunboat Joe Gorman as a Chief because he was so dink qualifying PPWS.

- I got hauled to the XO for telling Kevin Willy in front of the MAAs to "just take the speeding ticket, they are a joke" after he called me to come get him out of it. The single biggest jerk onboard was the fat CMAA Master Chief. I don’t recall his name.

- I ran into Roger Goodman in Hawaii a few years ago. He is doing great and was there to take samples of Pearl Harbor water for laboratory analysis. I was the Supply Officer (yes) on a Trident submarine at the time.

- The time I got called in and hauled down to AMR1LL by the Master Blaster who was trying to blame the over pressurized 1 plant secondary shield tanks on RE division because the high level alarm didn’t work. When I showed him there was no high level alarm and it was caused by the AMR guys who isolated something while the fire main leaked by, he got really pissed and told me that he was "gonna get me and all my RE dirtbags". So we went underground, told him anything he wanted to hear, RE became stars and six months later I got a mid-term eval from him that I was the "most improved, best CPO in Reactor Department." I still have that eval today as a souvenir.  My career was more successful than some, though, and I'm sure Chief Many Stars had something to do with it, for which I'm appreciative.

- The Phantom Shitter was there during both my tours, so it was nothing original. It happened on the my submarine, too.

- If you’re out there, Mel Ugaki (yes that’s his picture), remember inport San Diego when 1 plant was steaming alone, and you and I had three plant which was steaming into 2 and 4 plants as well, with all the drains coming back to 3. I was not a knowledgeable PPWS and you were just qualified CMO, we had the DFT was alternating out of sight low then out of sight high and it was the most scared I’ve ever been, thinking we were gonna die, roasted as lobsters.

- When some of us nub Chief selectees in ‘85 wanted to turn down Chief so we wouldn’t be like the lifers giving the classes, then MMC Kevin (the round one) Burke assured us "it’s OK, that stuff doesn’t apply to nukes". All but MMC P****e, that is, Mr. Thought He Was Still A Boot Camp Company Commander. Actually, there were nearly a dozen of us selected, and all but three turned it down and got out.

- The fights over whether the guard valve failures was electrical or mechanical. Of course, it was always mechanical. Wasn’t it?

- The time the 4 plant RM’s spent a week troubleshooting the 4A CTG governor because it was hunting so bad, and it turned out we didn’t have all the brushes down in the amplidyne. Perhaps that was unintended revenge for those times the guard valve was electrical.

- The 3 plant RC bilge alarms due to leakage from overfilled inner bottoms, but Skeletor insisted it was faulty bilge alarms and made us crawl in there to prove otherwise. I was so mad my nose exploded blood all over myself. I guess in retrospect I should have gone to get my blood pressure checked, but wasn’t every day as a nuke kind of like that, if not somewhat less dramatic?

- Jim Stokes, probably the single most intelligent guy I've ever met. Turned down Chief, got out and went to work somewhere around Cleveland doing something related.  He needed to be promoted from First Class straight to Captain.

- Mr. Comi, the RCA before Mr. Sevald. He went on to become a Captain in the east coast amphibious fleet.  He swore me in when I got commissioned.  A good man.

- Night time GQ on the hangar bay, starboard side, and slipping out to the pitch black sponson under the island to smoke and pee over the side. Want a heart attack? Try doing that with nervousness about getting caught, groping for the guard wires on the side, wondering if that helicopter out there is looking at you, and then have the Phalanx go off right over your head, scaring the holy crap out of you!

- LT Cook, the LDO in 2 plant. Last I saw him he was a CDR and the Repair Officer at TRF Bangor. Certainly retired now.

- Yes, Goldilocks Fuller was a trip. That was a leadership lesson for me because I kept letting him get away with stuff until I found out that the guys had banned him from coming in the plants. I do remember the heart monitor story and the other scams.  True. He won.

- I forget who, but the RE who popped positive coming out of Australia in 1986 who got off by using the Australian over-the-counter-cold-medicine-box routine, finding a box that somebody else happened to have.

- Captain Leuschner. That was a leader. Rocky the Flying Squirrel Spane who after taking command made reference to the engine rooms as the bowels, different story.

TRIVIA:

- Somebody mentioned earlier about post 1973 and calculators, which is actually a little off in timing. My NPTU class 7707 was the last to use the slide rule.

- To this day, whenever I hear an announcement starting with "This is…" my mind automatically finishes it with Senior Chief Ebersole saying "…a drill" on the ship’s 1MC in the unique way he would announce it.

- It has been my experience that most conversations with other sailors/ex-sailors is somewhat of a "yeah yeah who cares what ship you were on" but when you mention ENTERPRISE , heads turn and chests swell. You nubies in the 90’s and later hopefully will carry that same pride someday. It is OK if you don’t feel it now, because being a nuke isn't easy. You will. It is the greatest ship, and one of the greatest engineering marvels, ever built. Ever.

- You know how tubers always bragged about how gross they were, crusty, salty, etc. I got counseled more than once on my submarine for hurting people’s feelings, being offensive, etc. as a result of regular joking and cajoling, ala pre-PC Navy.  I guess they never came across an ENTERPRISE RE. A bunch of amateurs, I tell ya.

THANK YOU:

To the 45 RE’s during that October 85 to December 87 time frame that I was their boss. They were all Seconds and Thirds and I was but a boy Chief. They are the ones who put this website together, the dopey book is theirs, and they are prominent throughout the web site. Because of them, I was the only 1985 CPO selectee in the entire program which made Senior first time up in 1988.  When I did my little retirement blah blah blah speech in January 2001 I was wearing the same combination cap that underneath said my name, RE Division, USS ENTERPRISE, and I mentioned many of your names to people who would otherwise never know you, as that period of time was clearly the best part of my career. Ricky Kuhn, Jerry Wheeler, Greg Vernier, Kevin Willy, John Hanson, Randy Snook, Greg Brazier, Fullmer, Richard Marsh, Schaaf, Gyolai, not you Goldilocks, French, Griffin, Tuli, Hordyke, etc etc. I’m embarrassed I can’t name you all. Anyway, that is the best bunch of guys ever. We just worried about the important stuff. As a result, and I challenge any other group of RE’s to meet this:

- three times in a row Reactor Department Sailor of the Year (Kuhn, Vernier, Willy)

- EIGHT straight Reactor Department Sailor of the Quarters (Kuhn, Wheeler, Vernier, Hanson, Willy, Brazier, etc)

- Zero discrepancies on the 86 and 87 ORSEs

- Ship Sailor of the Year Runner Up (Willy)

- A bunch of other stuff that I can’t remember right now but was all good.

- And, dot dot dot, between Mr. McGuire and Mr. Amala, we didn't have an actual officer for about a year.

Keep up the good work, Ram and guys. You’ll always be the highlight of my career.

Another RM11 80's Nuke

Memories of Scotty Crow

Seeing Jim Whitsett's mention of Scotty Crow above reminded me of a funny story.  Scotty was a conventional electrician and stood many a SWGR watch with me when I was RE.  One mid-watch he and I were bullshitting and realized that we were both guitar players.  After watch we agreed to get together and jam.  It was about 4:00 a.m. by the time I met Scotty at his shop with my ax in hand.  We climbed inside some void and then crawled for quite a while until we came into an area that Scotty had set up as his own personal studio.  We jammed as loud as we could in there for an hour or so and then finally called it quits.  When I left the shop and started walking back toward berthing I noticed some officers in their bed clothes searching voids and escape hatches nearby.  They were furious and hoping to find the "asshole who was playing his guitar so loud" adjacent to their stateroom.  I told Scotty about it the next day and he laughed and said that sometimes he could hear those airdale zeros banging pipes on the bulkhead trying to shut him up.  He said that in the 2 or 3 years that he had been jamming down there no one had been able to find him.  I bet even the flying squad couldn't have found that space!

Without going into too much detail I bet most of you who knew Scotty will remember his fool-proof way of telling which PI hooks had the clap.  His method must have worked since he was never seen standing in the clap line.   

Big E RCOH Story from an MM2

Noting the posts from my former shipmates, Flowers and Thompson, I'll add a little to the 90's shipyard days:

Contrary to Brad's post, there were a few good things about the yard. Unlike probably most everyone else who served on the Big E at any other time, those poor suckers who were on her during the 90-94 RCOH probably were able to see and explore more of that old boat than anyone else ever had. 

Yeah, being a nub sucked, but having the Shaft Alley Patrol watch from balls-4 enabled me to explore that ship from top to bottom. I went from the bridge, to the cic, to the captain's quarters, to the admiral's space, to anywhere else you can imagine. That was pretty cool.

Other good memories include the RC-17 watch, which involved sitting in a tarp-constructed tent on the right, rear sponson next to the main valve between the ship and the shore steam source. There was a heater, a long tube running down to the water with a duct-tape cap on it for a makeshift toilet, a light off a spare power outlet someone found, and nice comfy chair. Not much to do, but I remember some fun times on that watch.

You guys who only saw the Pig fully operational (or even, at all operational) cannot imagine the state of the ship at her most torn apart. The interior spaces were so torn apart, it did not even resemble a ship. Huge gaping holes in the hangar deck, huge air hoses and wires strung everywhere, so much so that some passageways you had to crawl through, and the only light was from strung-up lanterns powered by generators on the hangar bay. Truly bizarre.

And every yardbird only said one thing to you: "Alright now." Catch eyes with one? "Alright now" Cold night, huh? "Alright now" Building 65 is one filthy piece of metal! "Alright now" With Uncle Sam paying $1 million for every day past the deadline the Pig sat in the yards, do you guys have any incentive to get this thing done?? "Alright now"

Ahhh, the good ol' days...

Another Late '80s RE Div Memory and A Short Item About The Umpa Lumpa Man:

I remember back when "Kid Pillow" wanted to be a model (see dopey book cartoon celebrating his first photo session).  The Kid wanted to have that Don Johnson "Miami Vice" razor stubble look for his headshot. But as he headed off for his first session the lifer chief on the brow refused to let him off because he hadn’t shaved. When EMC Whitsett found out about that he escorted Kid Pillow to the brow and told the lifer chief that he was going to personally take the Kid to the base barber to get him a proper shave and haircut. The sadistic lifer on the brow thought that was a great idea. As soon as Whitsett and the Kid were on the pier EMC returned to the ship and Kid Pillow was off to be a model.  As far as I know the Kid never did become a model.

My favorite EMC Whitsett story was one that occurred when 4-plant was about to go critical after a lengthy shutdown period. EMC was the PPWS and was making the rounds to make sure watchstanders had on TLDs before the steaming watchbill took effect. The ER LL guy on watch that day was an M-Div'er named Jennings. The best way to describe Jennings is to say that he looked like a giant Umpa Lumpa (from that movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory).

While we were getting ready to startup I overheard Jennings tell someone that he forgot his TLD. This guy asked Jennings why he didn’t sneak back up to berthing to get it and Jennings told him that he couldn’t because his TLD was back at his house in Sacramento.  Jennings laid low hoping that he could get through the watch without being noticed.

Then EMC came down and spotted Jennings hiding near the DFS.

"Hey where’s your TLD?" asked Whitsett.

"I forgot it," replied Jennings.

"Then go get it!" yelled Whitsett.

Jennings took off with a smirk on his face and ran up the stairs.

A few minutes later someone asked about Jennings and EMC said that he sent him off to get his TLD.  This person then informed EMC that if that was the case then Jennings was on his way to Sacramento (since that's where his TLD was). 

Whitsett ran as fast as he could to call the brow and tell them not to let Jennings off. But at that moment EMC couldn’t remember Jenning’s name. He tried to describe Jennings but couldn’t really do that because Jennings was so hard to describe. Finally EMC just told the brow watch that Jennings looked like "a giant Umpa Lumpa." At that instant Jennings was crossing the brow in his civvies on his way to Sacramento. The watch on the brow told EMC, "Hold on a minute chief, here comes a guy that looks like an Umpa Lumpa." Sure enough it was Jennings!

Also, do you guys remember when the XO suspended liberty until 4:00 p.m. each workday during the '87 SRA?  I remember EMC Whitsett authorized the "RE softball team," which had a game every day about noon.  (In other words a bunch of us non-duty REs showed up on the brow in shorts and T-shirts after all our work was done and told the watch we had a softball game.) We pulled this off until the team grew to be about 50 players and someone realized that there was no softball league at NAS Alameda. 

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Another RM From the '70s

ROSS H. WELCH MM1
#3 PLANT - RM DIVISION (HOME OF THE BEEF)

1974 - 1978